Hero of the Elemental Nations
by Kurogane7
Summary: AU: Naruto has traveled through the Elemental Nations, saving many lives in the process. One day, his whole life was changed by an encounter with a Kunoichi. What will this mean to a boy living in a world of Kunoichi? First Male Nin attempt, crossing with Fate. Noble Phantasm-armed Naruto/Harem. No Servants, reasonable number of girls. Rated T for now...
1. The Journey Begins

**_A/N: Okay, so my last submission as a serious story was not received well. Only 2 reviews and a lot more faves and follows. C'mon people! I'm serious when I say that your reviews will determine if that story will continue. In any case, I figured, since I've given Naruto the Gate of Babylon, what would happen if I gave him a different Noble Phantasm? It should be obvious that this is a different take of "First Male Nin". With that on mind, I shall sacrifice my last "First Male Nin" attempt to tribute-summon this Lv. 6 Fiend-type story with 2500 ATK and 1200 DEF. As usual, do read and review so that don't take any more battle-damage, would you kindly?_**

…

[Konoha Orphanage…]

"Are you kidding?!" shouted a bun-haired girl, watching incredulously as her friend loaded an improvised arrow into makeshift bow he'd made with a rusty kunai, "This isn't going to work!"

"It will!" responded the whisker-marked, blond boy with his own shout, releasing the tension gently to regard his friend, "I've worked hard to make this thing work!"

The girl let out a sigh of frustration. "I wasn't talking about the bow, Naruto; I was talking about you going out to be a kunoichi—or a shinobi, or whatever! The point is, how can you be a kunoichi if you can't even use chakra? And besides that, a bow is not a very practical weapon unless you're going out hunting!"

"Well what the hell is a guy supposed to do, Tenten?! The only weapons we can use are the stuff you girls throw away! I mean, yeah, shuriken and kunai are pretty cool, but what happens when your target is way too far for a jutsu to be used? Trust me, nothing beats a good old fashioned bow when it comes to long-range combat!"

It's been like this ever since Naruto picked up that book about that woman samurai Tomoe Gozen. Her whisker-cheeked friend was actually a fan of the woman, and she could see why—master swordswoman, damn good archer, and an even better tactician. Unfortunately for him, the Genpei War that Tomoe Gozen fought in was so long ago that it was doubtful that she ever existed…which was why Tenten decided to follow a modern legend like Tsunade of the Sannin. That scoff she let out made it clear what she thought of his worship of a likely-mythological character. "Yeah, sure."

"Look, you want me to fire that arrow or what? Because it looks like Lin-chan is getting nervous."

Standing up in front of a tree with a delicious-looking, red apple balanced on her head was a girl with her black hair done in a bob cut. She was nervous as hell, just as Naruto said—whether her wide eyes were filled with fear or excitement, nobody knew, but Rock Lin had volunteered to help Naruto with his archery practice. However, to kill two birds with one stone, Lin had also stated earlier that she would be balancing on one leg, swaying just a bit to give the boy a challenge.

With nothing else to say, Naruto readied his bow. The arrow was pulled back, the drawstring was tight, his form perfect. He had to time this right, or else Lin would be getting an arrow through the eye.

It all happened in a split second! The moment Naruto released the bowstring, the arrow was sent flying at high speeds before the tip had penetrated the apple through the core, and pinned it into the tree just as Lin had hopped into the air to switch legs in her pose. This was actually a rather good shot, as there was a brief moment where the apple had lifted off from her head. "Yosh! That's a nice shot there!"

But it wasn't over yet; Naruto had picked up another arrow that was dug into the ground next to him, took aim, and let it loose! This time, the arrow went at a higher angle to take an apple that was balancing atop the children's swing, and a corner of the roof of the orphanage, before the arrow started travelling downwards, and both apples were then pinned to another tree, just above a one-armed old woman in bandages sitting on a bench, minding her own business as she read the book in her hands. If only she knew how close she was to getting shot in the head. "Okay, you win. Bows can be just as deadly as normal kunoichi weapons!"

The victorious smirk on Naruto's face had said it all. "Told ya so!"

"Don't be so sure!" she shot back, "I believe I can be a kunoichi like Tsunade-sama, and beat your bow!"

"Really? And what are you going to bet?"

At that, Tenten could only blush. "If I win, you'll have to do everything I say. If I say, 'cook', you will cook. Understand?"

It wasn't that he minded…hell, he would've cooked at any day of the week. It's just that the wager made Naruto's blood boil at the idea of challenging Tenten at anything. "Okay then, but if I win, then you have to treat me to ramen forever!"

Their determined looks were only complimented by their confident grins. Naruto and Tenten shook hands, their wager would be revisited in the future.

…

[Somewhere nearby…]

As the wind blew through the trees near the Orphanage, the injured old woman took her good eye off the book to spare a glance at the children in the playground. The boy she knew to be Uzumaki Naruto was in the middle of shaking hands with the bun-haired girl Tenten. If anyone else saw her stony gaze at the children going back to their playing, they'd have mistaken her for a bitter old grouch.

Far from it, Shimura Sango actually had a motherly side—one that, regrettably enough, didn't manifest itself until it was too late…by the time she'd found these instincts awakening within her concerning her daughter, the girl was already a teenager and a high-ranked kunoichi. And even sadder was that they never started to reconcile until later in the girl's life…things were getting better, albeit gradually. At first, the girl refused to have anything to do with a woman that abandoned her to an orphanage, but the bonds between them started to grow stronger over the years…true, they never saw eye-to-eye on a great many things, but the love between them had blossomed over the years.

And when Sango learned that she was going to be a grandmother, she was ecstatic…and so she promised herself that she would not make the same mistake twice—she would actually be there for the child, and love it and help raise it to be a great person in the future. Unfortunately, the Kyūbi's attack on Konoha had put a damper on her plans. All she could do now was sit back, and enjoy the sight she was seeing. She may have failed as a grandmother, but she'll be damned if she is not there in the child's life—no matter how distant she was!

All other thoughts pushed aside, she resolved to keep on watching the children. Her thoughts were of the days that never came to be. Why must the past repeat itself, especially given that her daughter practically grew up in that same orphanage?

…

{Play: "Shadowlord's Castle" by Okabe Keiichi, from "Nier"}

As he looked around in his surroundings, he could not help but wonder exactly what it was he was looking at. The land itself was barren, but all he could see for miles were swords of all shapes and sizes that had been driven to the ground in a manner not unlike a graveyard. There was confusion on Naruto's face, as he tried to discern his current location. _'What the hell is all this?'_ he asked himself, _'What's with all these swords? Did somebody lose them or something? Come to think of it, where the hell is everybody? Where am I?'_

Naruto took the time to inspect one of the swords. _'Damn,'_ he thought to himself, _'now this is a fine sword. Still doesn't answer the question as to what it's doing here.'_ And it was true too—now he was not a weapon-nut like Tenten, but this sword was not like the ones he was used to seeing. It had a basket hilt, a short grip, and a long, slender blade with dull edges. In short, this was pretty much a spear turned into a sword, and the polish on the blade itself spoke volumes of the smith's skill.

Before long, darkness had started to creep in from the corner of his eye. "Oh no you don't!" he shouted, hoping that the darkness had heard him, "Don't you dare! I'm not letting you do this again!"

The darkness ignored Naruto's defiance, and continued to eat away at the image he was seeing. He even managed to pull one of the swords out of the ground and tried to make it go away. As if mocking his attempt, the darkness increased the speed at which it was eating everything away. It would not be long until his entire vision was filled with blackness…

…

[Naruto's room—8:30 AM…]

…And then he woke with a start, gasping in fright while the sunlight began to break into his vision. Naruto reached up to touch his forehead, remembering his dream. He'd been having it for quite some time now, and it was a source of confusion to him, no matter how many times he had it it. _'Someday, I'm gonna find out what that dream means, dattebayo!'_ he said to himself, _'But I'm also gonna protect my precious people, even if it kills me!'_

That said, he went to eat breakfast—no good sparring with Tenten on an empty stomach, and the surprise he had for her in the upcoming fight was likely going to be very shocking. He'd been training himself to use his left hand for the past few months out of everyone's sight. _'Just wait 'til Tenten sees the surprise I've got for her!'_ he thought while sniggering to himself, _'She's gonna be blown out of her mind when I fight her today!'_

…

[Gates of Konoha—seven years later…]

It'd been seven years since Naruto left the orphanage, and time had been kind to the boy that had been training in all that time. Gone was the baby fat of his childhood, and in its place was lean and wiry muscle for a boy of his age. His skin had taken on a slightly darker tone, adding more definition to his whisker-marks. He wore an orange, long-tailed vest over a skin-tight navy blue tank-top that exposed his abs, and a pair of medium-blue pants. Slung over his shoulder was a longbow, and holstered at his sides were a pair of large kunai with blades a little longer than the average adult human femur. Now he stood at the Gates of Konoha with an old woman in white robes near him.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay?" she asked, concerned for the boy.

"I'm really sure Bāchan," said Naruto, "I don't want to just stay in the village…I want to see the world with my own two eyes."

The playful smile on the older woman's features seemed to make it so that he didn't want to leave so much. Unfortunately, the wanderlust bug had bitten Naruto hard on the ass, and his curiosity had overridden his desire to stay. "Is an old woman not allowed to worry?"

"C'mon! I can take care of myself! Besides, I promise you that as soon as I get back, you'll be the first person to hear about everything I'm going to see." And it was true…Naruto was not just training on his archery—although he was truly a great shot to begin with. He was also a Nitō-ryu practitioner, much to the surprise of Tenten, who had decided to give the boy "Go Rin no Sho" for his birthday once to make his technique in the art even better. She also taught him in the art of throwing, which he found to be especially useful if he were to run out of arrows.

"Well, if I can't stop you, I can't stop you. Just promise me you'll be careful out there Naruto-kun. The world is a crazy place with all those psychos running about."

"I will!"

And with that said, Naruto finally left the village—he would not be seen again for a good three years.

…

**_A/N: I wonder, who can guess the identity of Sango's daughter? As to Naruto's Noble Phantasm, he's likely to be getting it early, but not this early._**

**_…_**

**_Vocabulary/Culture Notes_**

**_Nitō-ryu—this is literal Japanese for 'two sword style'. The practitioner of this art tends to wield either a katana and a wakizashi, or a pair of wakizashi, and pretty much fights while dual-wielding their weapons._**

**_"_****_Go Rin no Sho"—literally "The Book of Five Rings", a book written by legendary swordsman Miyamoto Musashi that is a treatise on war and martial arts, with many of its lessons holding true in business as well._**


	2. First Tracing

**_A/N: Success, and now this story has dealt Battle Damage to the opponent!_**

…

[Hokage's office—three years later…]

The day was rather good—no paperwork to sign, no Konami running around shouting 'time to die, hag!' (which she was insulted by, but also found cute in a way), and most definitely no council meetings today. Everything was peaceful for Hiromi, as she took out the cylinder from her robes, and opened it to pull out her kiseru…this was a wedding gift from her paternal mother when she married Biwako-chan (heaven rest her soul). It had an ornate steel mouthpiece and bowl, and the hollow shaft was made of black lacquered sugar maple with silver clouds inlaid on its surface.

Stuffing a wad of the hair-thin tobacco into the small bowl of the kiseru, and then lighting it, Hiromi started to relax as she began smoking, thinking back on the three years since Naruto had left the village. The recent council meeting had involved the boy like he was some hot commodity that everyone was fighting over. A good half of the civilian council demanded that he be banned from ever returning to the village, but the other half pretty much told them to shut the hell up as they demanded that Naruto be married into their families—Haruno Yumiko, the Haruno clan matriarch being the most vocal of all the merchant clans (Hiromi was pretty sure that the woman only supported Naruto to have him serve as her personal butler-slash-sex toy more than anything).

The kunoichi side on the other hand, seemed a little more sincere in their response, demanding they marry him off to one of their daughters for different reasons—none were more obvious than the Clan Heads. Each of them had different reasons for doing so, but the fact of the matter was that Naruto had become a hot topic to those women…like a rare trading card, or whatever, that is really hard to get. All of them wanted him to marry into their family, and they were willing to fight each other to the death for the right to have his hand in any of their daughters' marriage.

Amusing as it was to see those women bitching over a little boy (and a handsome one at that), Hiromi's thoughts went back to the day she let Naruto leave. She'd secretly sent a team of ANBU to shadow him in his travels. The boy had practically been to all the shinobi villages…Suna, Kumo, Taki, even Tanzaku city for a time, doing an odd job here and there, but working as a high-class mercenary at the same time. Luckily, the four-kunoichi team she'd formed in secret to watch over him was filled up with infiltration experts; otherwise, she'd have to deal with an international incident, along with the possible loss of the village's jinchūriki. That and he'd managed to make all sorts of friends in high places in all the villages he'd been to…once, he'd found friendship in the Tsuchikage's granddaughter after saving her life from a gang of bandits that killed her entire team, and held her hostage. Afterwards, the two of them went out to dinner and got along fine, ironic as it were, considering Naruto's family tree.

The curious thing about their reports however, was that they'd crossed paths with unfamiliar ANBU from Konoha once or twice. It didn't seem like anything serious to the naked eye, but there was something off about those women—these kunoichi kept watch over him for a few moments before going back to whatever mission they were up to. Hiromi had a pretty good idea whose ANBU they were, but she would confront the woman later…she needed more evidence for that, apart from just a few chance sightings.

Speaking of sightings, the last report Hiromi read was that Naruto was in Mizu no Kuni—the ANBU team reported that he'd crossed paths with the Mizukage unknowingly and treated the girl to his exquisite cooking skills to try and apparently fail to put a smile on the tyrant's deadpan face. What the hell was wrong with the girl? Was she dead inside or something? _'Come to think of it, I don't see why won't Naruto-kun start a restaurant here in Konoha if he's that good?'_ she thought to herself, remembering the last meal he cooked for her when she visited, _'I doubt he'd have trouble keeping it at a five-star rating with the way he cleans up his apartment…and that place (which was the only place available at the time unfortunately) is in the borderlands smack-dab between the Red Light district and the slums.'_

Continuing on with what she'd read of the report, after finding no good prospects for work in Kirigakure, he went back to the mainland where he ran into, and was threatened by the Kiri rebels. Their leader, a Terumi Mei, was at first suspicious of him, seeing that he'd come from Kirigakure, but his hard work at cooking food for her resistance and the uplifting words he let out of his mouth really raised their spirits. With their boost in morale from his acts of pure kindness, the Kiri rebels were inspired to keep fighting so that they could walk themselves into a better future (and maybe into his pants as well).

As she reclined in her expensive leather swivel-chair, with her pipe in hand, Hiromi wondered as to what adventure Naruto was going to get himself into today.

…

{Play: "Crescent Grizzly Stage" from "Rockman X5"}

[Unknown location …]

The rapid 'clip-clop' of horses drawing a carriage mingled with the rattling of wooden wheels rolling on a dirt road told all that heard it that a wagon were nearby, and they were moving very fast. However, if one were to listen very carefully, they'd hear the 'twang' of a bow launching arrows. That's because standing in the cargo bay of the wagon was Uzumaki Naruto with a bow in his hands, moving quickly to load an arrow, and then firing it at another poor soul that approached the wagon from behind.

The last three years had seen Naruto working as a mercenary to pay for his travelling expenses. His travels took him to wherever the work was, and he always chose his jobs carefully. One day, he accepted a contract to protect a village from bandits until they managed to organize a proper police force; the next, he was hired to hunt down a corrupt intendant that double-taxed the farming community he worked for severely. Today's job however, was simple: protect a merchant caravan as it made it through the woods from bandits—and it just so happened that among the wagons he was to guard, one of them was most important due to the fact that it carried the townspeople's tax money. Unfortunately, there were rumors that the bandits had some nuke-nin among them…kunoichi that had gone rogue. Luckily, he was able to take out a few of the bandits on horseback with his longbow. The next arrow he loosed pierced the poor bastard's eye, penetrated into his brain through the frontal lobe, and emerged from his occipital lobe and bone, stopping only at the back end of his helmet while still having plenty of force to knock the man off his horse. _'Eleven down, nine to go!'_ he thought to himself, _'My longbow has the edge at power and range, but their short bows are easier to load and better for horseback. They're going to want to get in closer before shooting. I also need to keep watch in the sky in case they decide to bring out the nuke-nin! '_

It was only fortunate that he had quite a few shots left—nobody knew how many kunoichi had joined these bandits, but it was known that there were a small number of them scattered among that crew. Hopefully, those women would figure that he's too much trouble and leave…he hated having to kill, but these men were beyond saving. Letting them live would only continue to make the world a worse place! If it were peasants desperate for some money to survive, he would've understood; if it were rebels fighting a legitimate tyrant like the one he'd heard of during his stay in Mizu no Kuni that was choking the life out of the people in some faraway town, he would've understood; but these 'men' on the other hand, had rap sheets that included rape, murder, petty theft, grand theft, extortion, blackmail, terrorism, and maybe a few dine-and-dashes thrown into the mix just for the hell of it. In short, nobody would miss these men he was killing off…he only wished that there was a better way.

Another arrow was ready for the attack, when all of a sudden, the remaining nine bandits had started to retreat. The second he heard someone landing behind him, Naruto knew that his problems were just beginning! He swung the bow around quickly to try and knock the kunoichi off the wagon, only to see her jump over the attack, and preparing a kunai for battle. Not a movement was wasted, as he used the momentum of the missed attack to mount the bow across his shoulder while freeing his hands for the long-bladed kunai he drew from his holsters to fight back. Surprisingly, they'd held up for a while now, but even he knew that they were getting close to the end of the line.

The sound of three more thuds surrounding Naruto told him that there were more kunoichi ready to attack. This was definitely not good! Just as he was about to attack, a fourth 'thud' had caused him to look past the kunoichi in front of him to see another one taking a seat next to the driver of the wagon. "Drive off the road, and stop!" she shouted, before turning her attention back to Naruto, "Uh-uh!" she loudly taunted, bringing her kunai around to threaten the driver, "One wrong move, and everything goes down."

She was right—taking out the driver would guarantee that the wagon would be loose. The unspoken command was very obvious; he was to drop all his weapons, or else the driver died. He dropped both of his kunai and simply stood and watched…analyzing all four of his opponents as he slowly reached for his bow, causing one of the kunoichi to throw a shuriken at his foot. "You really think we're stupid? Take that quiver off first, and then put your hands behind your head."

By the time the wagon came to a complete stop, Naruto took off the quiver, placed it down on the floor of the wagon, before finally reaching for his bow. "From the look of your hitae-ate, I'd say you're all from Kirigakure," he said, trying to look for a way out, and possibly rescue the driver, "and for some reason, you girls want me back. I didn't think your Mizukage liked me all that much."

"Bingo!" taunted the lead kunoichi, "Mizukage-sama simply sent us to get you back. She wouldn't say why, although…" she paused, giving him a closer inspection, before giggling and staring at him lustfully, "I wouldn't blame her if her reasons were of a more…personal nature. Hell, were it not for our orders to take you back alive, I would've just raped you on the spot."

The shiver of discomfort had shot down his spine upon hearing that, before watching as the kunoichi moved in on him. "I really don't know whether I should be scared or flattered," he said, fiddling with the bracers he'd recently bought months ago, "but something tells me that this job was a setup."

"And what if it is?" she asked, getting rather uncomfortably close to him, "We've got you surrounded, and if you don't do as we say, the driver dies. What the hell are you going to do about it?"

His fingers had managed to find what he was looking for! His plan was ready, and he targets were in his sights! "What am I going to do about it?" Naruto asked, faux wonder in his voice, "THIS!"

With a quick movement, both hands had separated, and quickly drew a pair of bo-shuriken he'd had hidden in a holster under his bracers before throwing them at the kunoichi holding the driver hostage, both of them being driven into the woman's eyes before tackling the shocked kunoichi in front of him and desperately smashing the back of her head into the corner of the chest before reaching for his kunai blades to successfully slit one of his enemies' throats, and turning to face the remaining two kunoichi—both of whom stood their ground, their shock was evident before they did something that made him nervous: they smiled.

Before anything else happened, all the kunoichi had burst into a shower of water! He was forced to turn around to watch as the driver had an evil grin on his face, before his outline had started dissipating to reveal he'd been a kunoichi all along. Red hair tied up to the sides of her head in a manner that made her look like a rabbit, sharp teeth silently threatening to eat him alive, and a pair of swords with curved protrusions at the tip of the blade and at the back of the sword near the hilt. Oh, he knew her alright—he never spoke with her, but this was Ringo Ameyuri, the only member of the Kiri no Shinobigatana Shichinin Shu that still served the Mizukage, and Momochi Ayaka's colleague. "You're not bad, gaki," she teased, both of her blades ready for the kill, "unfortunately for you, I killed the real driver of this wagon before you even left. Before even that, I killed all those kunoichi that were among the bandits, and pretty much hired them off for this job. They get their money, I can collect on their bounties, Yasuko-sama gets her boy-toy; everybody wins—well, except for you and the taxpayers of course."

"Bring it on, witch," he said, preparing to fight back, "I'm ready for you!"

The fight began when the both of them moved on in, their blades a flurry of slashes. Their movements gradually became more dance-like as they dodged, swung, and stabbed. 'Good thing I ran into Kimiko-chan', he thought to himself, ducking under another slash by Ameyuri before countering with a slash. It was true…that pale girl he'd run into in Kusagakure was a swordswoman of great skill—because he was nice to her, she decided to tell him something to help his swordplay that he managed to take to heart: "Be like water."

At first, he didn't get the message, until Kimiko explained that water has no definite shape of its own, and so it takes on all kinds of forms, and her exact words were: "…if you put it in a cup, it becomes the cup; if you put it in a bottle, it becomes the bottle; if you put it in the ocean, it becomes the ocean."

Now, he was weaving through a deadly swordswoman's slashes. It was obvious that she was the better fighter, and he was barely keeping up, but the words of wisdom that Kimiko had imparted upon Naruto were giving him a fighting chance. Before he could move in for another slash, Ameyuri had managed to find an opening in his attack to kick him in the face, causing him to drop both his kunai while sending him flying backward and on his ass up against a rock wall.

"Not bad at all," she said, her grin showing her sharpened teeth as she stalked closer towards him, "I've got to give you credit where it's due: you are by far the best opponent I've ever fought so far. Yasuko-sama only said to bring you home alive and in one piece…she didn't say anything about having **_fun_** with you before I take you back."

The look in her eyes, the way she grinned, and her sinister laugh had told Naruto of her intent—she was going to rape him. Her leap was such that it was clear that she was going to stab him before she did her deed. He was very desperate, all his weapons were too far away from him, he was cornered due to being kicked into a rock wall, and he had no taijutsu experience whatsoever. He needed a sword, and he needed it NOW! Just like that, Naruto felt something in his hand. He didn't care exactly what it was, just that his opponent was getting closer. He needed to time this just right…and as his opponent got closer, he bided his time.

[Play: "EMIYA", by Kawai Kenji]

His instincts were keen, his movement swift, and her expression was of shock! The second he swung the blade around, Naruto saw that his opponent managed to change her trajectory in midair; but what surprised him, and his opponent, was that this was a sword that the both of them knew very well: it was Kubikiribocho! What the hell was he doing with that sword in his hand?

"How the hell did you get Ayaka's sword?!" shouted Ameyuri as soon as she landed, before she pointed one of her Kiba swords at him accusingly, "You're a girl aren't you?!"

Finally finding the strength to stand back up, Naruto instinctually hefted the blade as if it were a part of him. "No, I'm a boy!" he shouted, readying himself to fight back if necessary.

At that moment, Ameyuri charged in and then shunshined behind Naruto only to be tripped up with the back of the sword before it finally shattered. Thinking quickly, he grabbed a shard from the broken blade and drove it down into Ameyuri's thigh, eliciting a loud shriek of pain from her. Leaving the sword behind, Naruto ran back, picked up his kunai blades and holstering them as he ran, before moving to the horses and driving away, and fast!

Ameyuri on the other hand simply glared at his back throughout the whole ordeal. One of these days, she was going to find him and then rape him to death! But first, she had to deal with loose ends…those bandits would be coming around shortly, expecting to be paid—not like she intended to pay those dirt bags anyway. Once she got back to Kirigakure, she'd have to explain herself to Yasuko as to why she'd failed to capture one boy. For now, she was going to deal with what was in front of her.

What she didn't count on however, was that there were other eyes that have been on the entire fight…eyes that would spread the story about a boy who could use chakra…

…

[Hashirama Art Gallery, Konohagakure no Sato—hours later…]

Housing many works of art from the village was the Hashirama Art Gallery, a building constructed on Senju Hashirama's orders to spark inspiration for the artists living in the village. Some of the artworks in the building were local artists who have made noteworthy ink paintings, while others were spoils of war that were collected overtime. All of them however, were works that made one sit down, ponder, and appreciate them.

Sitting on a bench in front of a painting of a lark on a bamboo branch, Sango used her good eye to appraise the work. It was a hobby of hers to come to this gallery to see the paintings whenever she had the desire for fresh air. This was also a rather discreet location for her ROOT operatives to come and pass on information to her…like now, when a bespectacled woman walked on up to the old woman, and took a seat next to her. She moved on closer, to her ear, and began whispering.

Sango raised an eyebrow at the woman's claim, before turning her free eye to regard her. The woman's expression was serious. Watching as her operative left the art gallery, she could not help but to feel concern over the news. But on the other hand, perhaps this was a golden opportunity…one that she needed to capitalize on if she intended to make things right again…

…

**_A/N: I shall be evil, and trouble you ladies and gentlemen with a ciffhanger!_**

**_…_**

**_Vocabulary/Culture Notes_**

**_Kiseru—this is the traditional Japanese smoking pipe. It is thin and straight, and it is made with a metal mouthpiece and bowl, and it has a shaft made of bamboo or wood. It can be carried in a cylindrical case, and the bowl is rather small to the point that a special kind of tobacco is prepared for smoking…sometime used for opium._**


	3. Pro Bono

**_A/N: I wonder, who caught the celebrity references in the story so far? In any case, this story is going on to 20 reviews so far…please don't be shy with your reviews, they are helpful—the more detailed you are, the better. As to the reviewer who asked that Ameyuri have a chance to redeem herself, I'll say this: she'll indeed get that chance (not that it matters anyway). In any case, since I forgot to say it on the last chapter, do read and review, would you kindly?_**

…

[Somewhere in Hi no Kuni—four days later…]

It was a good thing he drove that wagon really fast. Naruto was able to catch up with the caravan after ditching that crazy kunoichi and getting the folks' tax money back—his reputation as a mercenary was at stake here if he lost so much as a single 100-ryo bill. Sure, he wasn't being paid well for this job (as was often the case with his past jobs), but even with his basic-level education in the academy which was practically pounded into his head with 20-pound sledgehammers courtesy of Iruka and Namida-sensei complaining to the Hokage about him playing too many pranks in the village and not studying, he knew that reputation had a far bigger value than money can afford in his line of work.

_'__Plus, it makes me feel good whenever I help people in real need,'_ he thought to himself, walking out of the government office after collecting his pay from the merchants, _'now where to go…'_

As it just so happened, his stomach growled! Damn it! So far, the pay he'd managed to wrangle up was enough to make ends meet for today—as of now, he had enough money to eat his dinner, watch that new "Princess Gale" movie, and still have enough to take the next merchant caravan to Konoha…and a bar was often likely to have food to go with the drinks they served. Unfortunately, he needed a new longbow after dropping his during the escape, and maybe a few arrows, so he's likely to be penniless again. _'Eh, what the hell, may as well see if I can find some work while I'm at it. I'm pretty sure there'll be plenty of time to see Bāchan, but I hope that she will have plenty of answers as soon as I see her.'_

The thought of dinner had clouded Naruto's mind so greatly that he'd bumped into a figure that walked across him. With the both of them landing on their asses, Naruto looked upwards to see that the person he'd bumped into was an old man with a gut. He wore a tall, conical hat, and he had a backpack geared for long-distance travel. "Sorry about that," he said, offering his hand after standing up, "didn't see you there."

"Watch where you're goin' brat!" growled the old man, taking Naruto's offered hand and standing up.

"Well, we kind of bumped into each other, so I doubt anyone's at fault," stated Naruto.

The old man took a moment to appraise Naruto, taking his appearance to consideration. "Great, of all the people I had to bump into, I had to bump into a cosplayer."

Nothing was said by Naruto as he let the old man pass. It wasn't worth it to get into a pissing contest with him, given the bad mood he seemed to be in. Besides, he was way too hungry to argue…and if his luck held out, he'd be able to find some work.

As he strolled around town, he finally found what he was looking for after a few hours—and what he saw had lifted his spirits a great deal, as he was standing in front of a bar. Now he can find some food **_and_** work! He stepped through the swinging doors of the bar, fighting the urge to lie about his age to try out the newest spirits with his dinner, but Naruto could not help but feel a chill running up his spine. _'Who the hell is talking about me?'_

…

[Raikage's Office, Kumogakure no Sato…]

The sounds of metal rattling about in the room filled the air as the Raikage A went about her usual fitness routine. Yesterday, she worked on the lower body, focusing a lot on her squats and deadlift—today was all upper-body as she laid back on the bench-press, her arms lifting 55 pounds, coupled with eight 150-pound weights in total were giving her a real workout. She'd been doing this for the past few minutes now, with almost six sets of 100, and now she was on her eightieth repetition. Over the sound of the weights being pressed, A heard the sound of knocking. "Raikage-sama, may I come in?"

"Come on in!" she shouted, pressing the barbell up.

In walked her assistant, with a clipboard tucked in her arms, and a tray carrying a mug full of A's soy protein in her hands. "This'd better be important Mabui," she said, mounting the barbell back on its rack and sitting up, sipping away at her protein milkshake. A was a literal wall of muscle for a woman in her prime, standing taller than most men by a margin…her threatening appearance was not exactly worthy of being considered as eye candy; thick arms and legs, a wide body, strong sternocleidomastoid and trapezius muscles, a proportionally normal-sized head, a sculpted abdominis rectis, and a bust that rivaled the pair said to be mounted on the Sannin Senju Tsunade—couple that with all the softened curves that added definition to every inch of muscle in her form, and it painted the picture of a mother bear that was ready to maul anyone that threatened her cubs.

"Um, it's about that mercenary that came here about two years ago, Uzumaki Naruto?"

Ah, now there was a name that A thought of day and night. Come to think of it, there was something about that boy and the way he moved that caught her attention. A mercenary by the name of Uzumaki Naruto did indeed stay in Kumogakure no Sato for a bit, looking for work so that he can get back on the road. But in the meantime, he wanted to see the village for his own enjoyment.

At first, A thought he was a spy sent over from one of the other Hidden Villages to see government buildings (it was not unheard of for men to be sent over as spies). After seeing the sincerity of his words, she allowed him to stay—but under strict guard, and under the watchful eyes of both of her Jinchūriki. That and he was not allowed to work in the village in anything related to combat, and so his kunai blades and his longbow were confiscated for the duration of his stay. What he'd heard from both Killer B and Yugito was that he'd found work as a civilian, taking the small takoyaki stand he'd worked at and turning it into a five-star seafood restaurant in a matter of weeks was nothing short of a miracle (both of them vouched for the cooking, and A put on almost 90 pounds from eating his food on a daily basis). His cooking was so good that many other restaurants tried to kidnap him to destroy the competition and bring up their own profits—not that it mattered, because he'd already left Kumogakure after accumulating enough funds to travel again.

"What about him?" she asked, fondly remembering the time when she visited his restaurant (which the owner planned to give him before he left) with both Yugito and B…she remembered with amusement how the two of them seemed to gravitate strongly to him. She didn't blame them, after all, the boy was handsome; that and she had those same feelings—whether it was romantic love or motherly love, she couldn't tell, but she knew that she loved the boy too…and it hurt her just to say goodbye.

"W-well, he **_is_** a boy, right?"

"Out with it."

With a sigh, Mabui decided to get it over with. "The kunoichi we'd sent to spy on him and watch his movements witnessed him doing battle with Ringo Ameyuri. They also watched him create a large sword from out of nowhere, and used it to defeat her before fleeing."

A raised eyebrow was all it took to show her thoughts on the matter. "You're serious?"

"Those girls were our best infiltration specialists…they shadowed him from Yūgakure all the way to Suna, and then to Hi no Kuni."

The thoughts racing through A's mind traveled at light speed, while the grin on her face became more and more pronounced, worrying Mabui to no end—it was like a bear that had found prey! "Send our spies to find out where he's going next. The second he's found alone, I want the shinobi to extend an offer to him for permanent residence here in Kumo."

"But what if he goes to Konoha?"

"Then there's nothing we can do. The scandal from the Hyūga Incident still hasn't disappeared in the slightest, and even if we were pretty much in the right at the time, I still want to avoid one as much as possible. No, I don't want another scandal; I just want that boy to join us willingly."

"Very well then A-sama, I will relay your orders to those kunoichi," said Mabui, bowing before her boss, "by the way, have you decided on a team for the Chūnin Exams yet?"

"I have a pretty good idea on who to send…"

…

{Play: "Evil" by Toshiro Masuda}

[Somewhere in Otogakure no Sato…]

Silence reigned in the halls of the secret base, which was a blessing considering the person who owned it. The same could not be said for one particular room in said base, where experiments were being performed. Laid out on the operating table was a girl who was tied down upon its face, her pain had long turned to relief ever since the woman responsible for her condition had stopped to take a break. It wouldn't be long, and she knew it…her suffering was only beginning, given what she knew of her tormentor.

Unfortunately, her agony would be continuing sooner than she thought, because out of the corner of her eye was the very woman that frightened her to no end. Lithe and graceful curves, a slightly generous bust that matched up with her moderately curvy BWH measurements, and smooth, chalky-white skin gave the appearance of a Goth beauty. Adding to her features was a heart-shaped face that was framed with ebon strands of straight hair, and adding contrast to her chalky-white skin was the design of the black and purple makeup and lipstick that, when combined with the yellow cat-slit eyes, evoked the image of a snake that was hypnotizing its prey. "Now then Tori-chan, we both knew this was coming," she said in a baby-talking voice, with a full syringe in her purple-manicured hands, "you and I both know that saying such things about me is a big no-no, and yet you still chose to make fun of me in front of your friends. Now, you and I are going to have…**_fun_**!"

The girl named Tori seemed to struggle as she saw the woman swabbing an area inside her elbow with alcohol before moving the syringe into position, the tip of the needle was ready to be jabbed into the vein that exposed itself. She closed her eyes, ready for the…"Otohime-sama!"

A moment's fidget was all Tori needed to know that Otohime was not pleased. She would have let out a sigh of relief were it not for the look in her hollowed-out eyes and the fierce and silent snarl seemed to say 'you got lucky', before she turned her attention to the kunoichi that interrupted the 'fun'. "What is it?"

The kunoichi had a feeling that her mistress' anger was barely being contained. She gulped before working up the bravery to speak…she had to be careful, as Otohime-sama had a nasty habit of shooting the messenger; particularly one that appeared to be wasting her time. Hell, she would not just be experimented on—she'd be experimented on, **_while_** being raped. "Our spies in Kumo have heard word of a boy that used a jutsu while confronting Ringo Ameyuri."

Upon hearing that, Otohime began creeping slowly up to the woman menacingly. "Are you kidding me?" she asked, as her tone took on a sickly sweet tone, "Do you think I'm stupid?"

"N-n-not at all madam," she answered, backing up with every step until she found that she was in the corner of the lab, "i-i-in fact, our s-spies in Kiri have corroborated that story. They said that Yasuko was interested in that boy to the point that she sent Ringo after him."

Okay, now that was better, but she still wasn't convinced. "Do our spies have a name?"

"Uzumaki Naruto."

Her eyes had widened in surprise upon hearing that name, and there was a reason for her skepticism: since the day chakra had been introduced to the human body, only women were able to take full advantage of the energy by molding and shaping it in order to use jutsu—men on the other hand, were born with chakra coils the same as women were, but did not develop the ability use the energy unless they used pre-made seals (assuming of course that they had enough chakra flowing in their bodies to do so). This was why even though it was perfectly acceptable for male-female marriages to happen (uncommon as they were in this day and age), all Kunoichi clans encouraged lesbian marriages to increase the chances of a girl being born in the family—this was especially made possible due to the creation of the now-ubiquitous, expensive, one-shot seal that temporarily granted the woman fully-functioning male genitals. However, a license was required to purchase those seals in order to control cases of rape using them, and any woman in any nation caught using that seal without one would be put to death without trial (not that it would've stopped Otohime from raping her test subjects with the ample supply of them she got from the black market…even though she was a bit of a bodysnatcher, she still had needs!).

_'__This can't be possible!'_ she thought to herself, _'There's no way that he could've…unless…'_ It was at this point that her sinister grin had returned onto her features. Oh, this was perfect! This was her chance at revenge! Contrary to what her sensei thought, Otohime would not even touch the position of Hokage with a ten-foot pole…it would've put scrutiny on her the second her experiments were found out. In hindsight however, she would've been able to approve said experiments with no backlash. Don't get her wrong, she found Namikaze Mina to be a good choice of Hokage (loath as she was to admit it, she was a great leader), but the fact was that her position seemed to have been given to her with help in high places—Sarutobi-sensei didn't do it because she wasn't supposed to, which left the Hag (who in turn called her a Fascist) convincing Homura and Koharu to elect the girl to her position at a young age.

Now normally, this would not bother her. But then again, Otohime knew the Hag's dirty little secret—hell, she'd known for quite some time now about her secret; and with that knowledge came the feeling of being cheated. Nobody cheats Otohime and gets away with it! If anything, she only saw Mina and her wife Kushina as bitches that should've been broken and made subservient to her needs, and willing to go through any perversion she thought up of. To kidnap and rape their child was more than enough revenge for her ill-won term as Hokage…plus, it would've been a great experiment to see if this would transfer on to other boys she'd give birth to. Add that to the yandere feelings she'd had rising through her heart, and her determination to see this through had skyrocketed.

"Tell our spy in Konoha to keep an eye out," she finally said, "when I give the word, she'll kidnap Naruto—I'll leave it up to her how she brings him here."

"Yes ma'am."

With the messenger gone, Otohime turned back to her subject with an evil glee on her face. "Now then, where were we…?"

…

[Shimura Clan Compound, Konohagakure no Sato…]

While not as grandiose or prestigious in the village as the Senju or Uchiha clan compounds, the Shimura compound was no slouch. Despite all that, Sango was pretty content, even though she was pretty much alone in the compound, but that was just the way she liked it—all peace and quiet. The meal she'd made and was eating at the moment was light and healthy, but without compromising on taste so that she could keep fit despite her age…steamed chicken, pickled vegetables, and a side of tea. She cooked for herself because, aside from the ROOT detail she'd assigned as security to this house, she didn't trust servants to keep things a secret, nor did she trust them with her life…that, and they could never cook the way either of her mothers could anyway.

As Sango ate her dinner at home, she looked up at the wall to see a giant v-shaped wooden shuriken about as large as a man and bands of leather tied at both ends. She'd never worked up the strength to use that weapon effectively, but she knew the damage it was capable of—after all, her paternal mother was the one who wielded it to devastating effect. She once remembered seeing that thing in action when she was a little girl; whenever her mother threw it, it always returned to her hand after cutting through multiple kunoichi. By far, she was one of the strongest kunoichi she'd ever seen, seconded only by Tsunade herself.

Picking up the teacup to sip on the green tea imported from Cha no Kuni, she remembered that her paternal mother once made her promise to make an heir that would be worthy of the Hiraikotsu…if not as a weapon, then as a family heirloom at the very least; at this point, Sango believed that her 'father' was rolling in her grave right now—in fact, she was certain that she'd been rolling in her grave the minute she decided to leave her daughter in the orphanage after her maternal mother died giving birth to her, and continued to do so even after forty-two years. She never saw her daughter again until a random encounter had pushed them together in the same proximity; the girl didn't know who Shimura Sango really was at the time, but Sango knew exactly who the girl was at first sight…and much to her shock, she looked exactly like her maternal mother! She was twelve going on thirteen, and had recently been promoted to Chūnin; a rare prodigy that comes every few generations. She also had a strong, loving, and beautiful girlfriend in her arms that was loyal to her to the end…and she knew that girl well due to her status in the village.

The very sight before her at the time seemed to inspire a feeling inside her, one of many that she swore she would quash on her belief that emotions made people weak, and that girl did the unspeakable by being in the same room with her, with all these good things going for her in front of Sango's eyes: she made her feel proud. The pride came from her promotion to Chūnin at a young age, from being strong, and having such a loyal girlfriend to love her—but above all, that this was her daughter. However, with that feeling of pride, came feelings of shame and regret…both of which were because she'd just remembered that she had no right to feel proud of the girl, to claim her as her daughter, or even love her like a mother should. She'd abandoned the girl to an orphanage when she was but a baby for her own selfish reasons, and that was probably her worst mistake of all, when she came to realize later on that her love for her daughter was not weakening her by even a margin—quite the opposite, it gave her more than enough resolve to perform acts that would make even the great Morino Ibuki wince, most recent among them being that she asked the Fascist to implant those Uchiha eyes and Hashirama-sama's face onto her 'crippled' arm and a single Sharingan in her own eye socket. And it scared her, when she came to realize that she would burn the world to cinders for her daughter and her family, and she would gladly do it with a smile on her face.

Should she have killed the girl when she was born? Smothered her with a pillow while she was still in the proverbial crib? Could she even have mustered the ruthlessness to commit such an atrocity? The cold, ruthless, ambitious side of her once whispered in her oh-so-seductive voice that she could, and definitely should have done it…that way, at the very least, the girl would not have to find out that she'd abandoned her—that she would at least be with her mother in the afterlife, and that Sango would be able to continue on her path to glory unburdened. That voice was long dead, and had started dying since the day she met her daughter and her lover—a moment that had introduced a light that poisoned and slowly killed her dark side over the years, and replacing it with a desire to make things right with her daughter.

As she finished her dinner, Sango could not help but smile to herself. After hearing what she'd heard from the ANBU agent in the art gallery, she now saw her opportunity to indeed make things right with her daughter and her grandchild. Everything was moving along smoothly, and preparations were being made…unfortunately, it also meant that if she was right, then the child would need her protection in the coming days—more than what her ROOT operatives may be able to provide, especially if the Fascist hears of her grandchild. Bah! No need to think on such things! Well, not yet at least.

Looking on at the kunai that was mounted on the stand against the wall and underneath the Hiraikotsu; to think, one small and innocuous weapon would be a source of fame but its unique tri-pronged design was legendary; a word she never thought would be used in association with any kunai. Other than that, it represented her pride in its creator's ingenuity. Sango toasted with her teacup at the kunai—her head bowed low in reverence. _'To Namikaze Mina,'_ she recited silently to herself, tearing up slightly, _'we may never have seen eye to eye, but there are many things I thank her for: I thank her for being one of my best friends; I thank her for being a worthy adversary; and I most sincerely thank her for being a great Hokage…may she forever rest in peace.'_

With that on her mind, Sango drank her toast. Tonight, it was tea—next time, it would be the finest sakè that money can buy…

…

[Naruto's current location—the next day…]

His steps towards the Travel Agency were lacking in spirit—and that was mainly because Naruto was not able to find a job in the bar he'd been to last night. Although, he did enjoy himself for a bit because he went to the Princess Gale movie before heading off to the inn to stay for the night. He also had enough funds to buy a brand new longbow and quiver to replace the set he'd been forced to leave behind…yeah, aside from the lack of employment, it was a pretty good day. Hopefully, his luck would hold out and he'd get to find some work before leaving; or at least, he would be getting an express trip to Konoha. _'The sooner I see bāchan, the sooner I can get my questions answered.'_

Halfway towards the Travel Agency, Naruto caught a familiar sight in front—it was the same man he'd bumped into yesterday. He seemed to be getting into a heated argument before the teller closed the shutter. As soon as it closed, the old man seemed to be seething at whatever discussion had been going on before he got there. Once he turned around to see Naruto walking towards him, the old man let out an exasperated sigh. "Let me guess, you're here to hitch a ride too."

"I am."

"Well you're out of luck kid; the receptionist just told me that all the caravans are out of town right now."

"You've got to be shitting me."

"Unfortunately, I'm not. And now that I know my luck's run out, I'm going to have to walk."

Damn it! He just had to hope for too much! Naruto sighed and turned back to the old man. "Where are you headed anyway old man?" he asked, depression thick in his voice.

"Konohagakure no Sato."

Upon hearing that, Naruto raised an eyebrow. "You're not looking to hire a kunoichi team are you?"

"How'd you know?"

"The fact that you seemed to be on the verge of yelling at the receptionist tells me that you're probably not on a pleasure trip," began Naruto, before an idea had cropped up in his head, "how about I escort you to Konoha, free of charge?"

"You serious? I don't have the time to babysit a kid like you that's playing mercenary, so why don't you go on home?"

"Funny you should say that, old man—Konoha **_is_** home for me, so why not let me come with you? I get to go back to Konoha, you get a pro-bono bodyguard; we both win."

The old man seemed to consider Naruto's words for a moment, before shrugging. "Alright kid, you get to come with. But if I suspect for a second you can't be trusted, I'm going to spread the word that you're the most unreliable mercenary in the world."

"Fair enough," said Naruto, turning to walk down the road before suddenly stopping. 'Damn it! I always forget to do this!' With that, he turned to face the old man again with his right hand outstretched. "Sorry about that, the name's Uzumaki Naruto."

At first, he was hesitant, but there was no lie in the boy's eyes. What did he have to lose? "The name's Tazuna."

…

**_A/N: And now, we are getting ready for the first arc of the story..._**

**_…_**

**_Vocabulary/Culture Notes_**

**_Takoyaki—this is pretty much fried octopus in batter. Served in a spherical shape, and sometimes like dango through a skewer._**


	4. Return to Konoha

_**A/N: I wonder which of my readers caught the movie reference I've made in relationship to Sango and Otohime? Anyway, ladies and gentlemen, when I said that the Harem was going to be a reasonable number, I meant that while there will be a lot of one-sided girls trying to go after Naruto; some will not be that interested in him. I will reveal as to which pairings I've made happen here at the bottom. Also, if you haven't gotten it right as to who Sango's grandchild is before now, would you kindly do a facepalm? In any case, do read and review, would you kindly?**_

…

{Play: "Evil" by Toshiro Masuda}

[Unknown location…]

'Damn it!' thought Naruto, looking out at the expanse of land before him. As usual, he kept on seeing this sword graveyard in his sleep! As usual, he kept on seeing that expanse of burning orange sky—not that he hated the view of course, because it was actually a very beautiful (if lonely) scene, but he had to ask himself; why is it always dusk here?

"It's not dusk," said a voice from behind, startling Naruto, "it just looks that way because of the fire."

The second he turned around, he discovered that the speaker was a woman with dark skin, red eyes, and unkempt pale orange hair that went down to the small of her back; she was sitting down while her gaze was transfixed upon the horizon of this barren land. What caught Naruto's attention was also that she had a very sleek and strong body type that seemed to be made of corded muscle, coupled with her shapely curves—a description made especially clear due to the fact that she wore nothing at all. He could not identify her expression, but he could tell that she was mesmerized by the sight before her. However, his thoughts immediately went to what it was that the woman just said: "Fire?"

"It doesn't feel like it, but there is a fire out there—and it's been burning for quite some time now. It's actually very beautiful…to think, that such a place exists at all."

Something about this woman was off. With that said, he picked up the nearest sword he could find—if it could be called a sword, because the blade twisted around in a helical shape before ending in a point. The thing looked more like a carpenter's screw or a drill than an actual sword. In either case, he held the 'sword' in a ready stance befitting a one-handed sword; he wanted answers, and he was desperate enough to threaten a woman for them. "Who are you? What are you doing here? And where are we?"

A light chuckle had left the woman's lips as she stood up. "Feisty," she said, clearly amused by Naruto's antics, "it seems that that bit about you never seems to change. It's respectable, actually. However…" In a flash, she vanished in a blur, reappeared before him, and grabbed him in a one-handed chokehold that made Naruto drop his sword before raising him up to eye level. Her voice, while not lacking in its mirth or in her amusement on her vulpine features, seemed to be taking on a more dangerous edge. "…you have the nerve to threaten me. I could very well kill you here and now you know…but fortunately for you, I like you too much to kill you. Now let me make this clear…" she then threw him to the floor, before dancing around and allowing bright lines of energy to streak around to form the wireframe structure of a sword in her hand and bringing down the Kubikiribocho down in such a manner that the rounded notch near the hilt of the blade was around his neck. "I own you. You are nobody's property but mine. Anyone else who thinks otherwise can kiss my ass. If I tell you to jump, you will ask 'how high?' If I tell you to make love to me, you will ask 'fiercely or softly?' and I expect you to pleasure me as if your life depended on it (which it kind of will)."

Before she could say anything else, the woman suddenly diverted her attention to her surroundings just in time for an annoyed look to cross her savage-yet-regal features. Naruto managed to swivel his eyes around to see exactly what it was that interrupted the woman—the darkness had returned to consume everything once more. The woman then turned her attention back down to Naruto before pulling the sword out of the ground and shouldering it very easily as if it were light as a feather, watching as his vision began to be blacked out. "You got off easy; but next time, I WILL BREAK YOU!"

…

{Play: "Slinger's Song" by Darren Korb from "Bastion"}

[Near Konohagakure no Sato –one week later…]

It'd been a week of traveling since Naruto had started following Tazuna—although the former had made it clear that it was pretty much a one-timer, as normally, he'd charge whatever the people could afford pay at the time. It didn't matter if it was simply food, or water for the trip; so long as it was helpful to his travels, it was payment enough. And at the moment, Tazuna felt that he was lucky to get such a good deal: just one day into their journey, and he'd seen the boy shoot a bear through the eye before putting the poor thing out of its misery by slitting its throat. Some of the bear's meat was served up for dinner throughout the journey, while the rest was either buried (which was the case with the liver) or dried for later. The fur however, would've fetched a fair price given its quality, which was why he'd been hauling it around—he'd best hope there were no animal rights activists in Konoha though.

"Well, we're nearing our destination Tazuna-san," said Naruto, walking towards the guard post, "either way, it looks like we're sticking together for a bit longer. I have some questions for the Hokage as soon as I get there."

"What would you ask?"

"Quite a few things."

The two of them had just made it to the guard post, with the kunoichi stationed there taking notice of the both of them. If one ignored her bandaged face, they would see that she was quite a beauty. "Ah! Naruto-kun! You're back!" cried out the guard excitedly, "I didn't think you'd ever return."

"Kōtetsu-chan! How are things with Izuna-chan?"

"Fine, we're still dating though," answered Kōtetsu, before turning her attention to Tazuna, "and who's this?"

"Tazuna, he's here to ask for a mission from Bāchan."

"And what about you? What's the purpose of your visit?"

"I have some questions for her."

"Well, I hope you have your travel passes."

Naruto reached into a pocket inside his vest, and pulled out his travel pass to present to the woman. Tazuna did the same, and Kōtetsu took the time to authenticate both. Satisfied, she let out a nod. "Okay then, both of you have a nice visit now!"

Once everything checked out, both Naruto and Tazuna left the booth before seemingly going their separate ways. The second that the two of them were out of earshot, Kōtetsu let out a sigh. "We still on for tonight?" asked a voice from behind her. The woman wore a bandana over her head, and wore a skin-tight shirt with a collar that went up to her neck.

"Hai, Izuna-chan, we're still on."

"It really has been a long time since we last saw the gaki…if we weren't going steady, I'd have tried to put the moves on him."

"You're not the only one; although do you think we should've told him about the mission?"

"Nah, I'm pretty sure he'll find out."

…

[Somewhere in Konohagakure no Sato—twenty minutes later…]

Tazuna was a bit tired from the journey, he was both hungry and in need of a drink to calm his nerves; he didn't blame him one bit, and so Naruto had directed the man to a restaurant he'd once visited that was owned by the Akimichi clan head. He remembered those days well—it was a while after he'd read "Go Rin no Sho" at Tenten's insistence, especially since that it was a birthday gift from her. He'd found himself sleeping from the reading, so he had to force himself to read every single word that Musashi had to say. Thankfully, he was able to catch snippets of information from the book until he found himself literally absorbing every scrap of knowledge it had to offer…one lesson jumped out at him in particular, pretty much saying that it was better to know how to do a lot of things than to just specialize in just one skill. That being said, he decided to take up cooking lessons by pretty much watching and learning from the Akimichi women in the clan restaurant—he spied on them, studying their movements and actions so that he got a basic understanding of how to cook. At first, he tried to cook his own dish, which was a total failure…he shivered upon remembering the piece of crap it turned out to be both in looks and in taste. '_Man, I am never mixing Mapo tofu with ramen in that way ever again!'_

However, as he kept observing the Akimichi chefs at work, he was able to improve to the point that he was able to survive on his own food when ramen was unavailable. One day though, he'd served up a surprise dish for Ayame-chan and her dad to thank them for such good service—it just so happened that a tired and hungry Akimichi Chō had stopped by their ramen stand for a bite to eat before she went home to sleep…once the dish was eaten, Chō-sama asked where he'd learned to cook; to which he responded that he'd been watching the Akimichi chefs in her family restaurant cooking, experimented on his own, and then eventually developed his own style from there. Next thing he knew, both Teuchi-jiji and Chō-sama were pretty much fighting with each other to hire him as a head chef. '_Business must've been __**REAL**_ _slow for both of them.'_

Every step he took through the village was like walking through memory lane—every store, every face, they were exactly as Naruto remembered. Three years did not seem to do much to change home for him, and that much was certain as he looked at the buildings. Unfortunately, this also meant that there were a lot of people that seemed to ignore him like the plague for some reason…this was less so with the women given that at least 90% of the female population seemed to like him, (of that population, at least 65% of them were kunoichi). The men on the other hand, could've been no less than 50% that liked him, and he knew this because he always felt like a lot of guys were trying to burn a hole in him with laser beams. '_Come to think of it, what __**exactly**_ _did I do for them to look at me like that? Ah well, who needs them? At least there are people who actually seem to like me!'_

His musings were cut short the second he heard the whistle of objects flying in his direction, and Naruto was forced to back-flip away from four weapons as the dug into the ground from being fired at high speeds before being kicked from behind and then wrapped up in chains. Before he could make another move, he felt a prickling sensation at many parts of his body, shortly before he was hung upside-down. "Yosh! And the capture is a success!"

Oh he knew that voice! It'd been a while, but he still recognized it!

"Lin, how good to see you again," said Naruto, referring to the adorable girl with the bowl-cut. She seemed to have a banana-shape to her curves, and small breasts that seemed to aid in an aerodynamic motion; but what was telling about her was that her adorably large eyes were looking up at him with contrition. "I'm guessing Tenten is somewhere around here?"

"Sorry about that, Naruto-kun, but Hokage-sama has put out a bounty on your head for you to be brought to her alive." answered Tenten with a sympathetic look on her features; the years had been kind, giving her a modestly-growing bust to at least allow her to seduce whoever she needed should it be necessary to do so, but the girl kept her trademark buns. "She's paying quite a bit of money for any genin team to bring you in, and I'm afraid that the bounty is too good to pass up."

"Oh, come on! I was going to see her anyway!"

"Be that as it may, you should be fortunate that Fate has chosen to allow us to capture you." came the voice of a very stern girl he knew very well. Naruto turned his head to see the speaker to have long, black hair; had very attractive curves to her pale-skinned body; and was dressed almost entirely in beige. Her face was seemingly frozen in a dignified scowl that framed a pair of eyes with white pupils, which had given her away as a Hyūga, and one he'd seen around whenever he visited Hiasa-sama to see Hinata-chan and her sister Hanabi-chan. He also knew that the hitae-ate around her head hid a Caged Bird seal on her forehead, one that was a dead giveaway that she was a member of the Cadet Branch. "Had it been another team, they would have probably been pestering you with date requests. Besides, we've had a pretty good track record so far, and I'll be damned if that changes anytime soon…"

No wonder he was unable to move! "Nami-chan, how good to see you! And I see you're still prattling on about fate. Haven't you gotten tired of it yet?"

"Prattling? I'm only speaking the truth."

"Say what you will, it's actually getting boring…if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were having a love affair with Fate. Tell me, how soon can I expect to see you knocked up with Fate's lovechild?"

Just as she was about to attack Naruto for his comment, a hand had stopped Nami from attacking. "Unyouthful as his words were, he's technically right, Nami. You _**do**_ prattle on about fate way too much," said the voice of the woman stopping Nami, "and I hope you realize that if you hurt him beyond necessary, the Hokage's probably going to dock your pay to treat him?"

"Whatever!"

"As for you Naruto-kun," said the woman, turning to face Naruto. This woman, who was likely Tenten, Lin, and Nami's leader, had a bowl-cut that was similar to Lin's, and was also wearing a jumpsuit. However, what set Maito Gal apart from her student Rock Lin was the fact that she was taller, had smaller eyes, a modest bust for her size and age, a fairly well-muscled body, and a jōnin flak jacket. "I'm sorry that this is the kind of welcome you've been treated to…and my hip girlfriend Kasumi-chan would've loved to see you again, but we have our orders.

Assured that their target was not going to escape, Tenten lowered and unraveled the chains, before watching as Lin walked up and hefted Naruto over her shoulder. Her hand then unknowingly wandered off to grab Naruto by the ass…followed by a reflexive squeeze. Lin's sexual harassment aside, Team Gal simply walked on to the Hokage tower ignoring the look of jealousy that Tenten was shooting at Lin.

Who would've thought that the day would get exciting?

…

[Hokage's Office—nearly two hours later…]

Sitting behind her desk with her kiseru in her mouth, and her student Jinya's latest work in her hands, Hiromi simply waited. It just so happened that this report had come in not too long ago. She'd put out a standing order to all genin teams that Naruto was to be captured and brought to her alive and kicking, with an unsigned check for the pay of a B-rank mission as the reward money. She wondered exactly who it would be that brings in Naruto-kun first.

Her question was answered when the hooded and masked visage of Hatake Kasumi walked in with her genin team; which was odd, considering she'd heard word that her girlfriend Maito Gal had gotten to Naruto-kun first. Hiromi then took in the appearance of her genin team. Standing pretty in a blue shirt, beige shorts, Uchiha Tsukihime had the makings of being a new ice-queen with her proud appearance…given the alpha female upbringing by her paternal mother Fubuki, she supposed that it was no surprise, especially since it gave the girl some competition with Inuzuka Kira who was also on her team. The two of them had been duking it out since the day Naruto left the village on his traveling trip, always trying to one-up each other…even though Tsukihime constantly refused to admit that she ever liked Naruto.

Regarding her teammate-slash-rival with a competitive fire in her eyes, Inuzuka Kira and her dog Akamaru were truly a team that exemplified the power of the Inuzuka clan. What made Kira's attraction to Naruto different from Tsukihime's was that she was a lot more open about it…come to think of it, 'open' was actually a nice way of putting it; she outright hugged and kissed him in public, much to the ire of most of the girls he spent the most time with…and it didn't help their rivalry that she especially did it in front of Tsukihime. At the moment, it seemed that while she didn't show it, Tsukihime returned that competitive glare with a sort of colder glare that seemed to fill the room with an invisible jet of steam.

The last member of their team, walked into the room, dragging a hogtied Naruto-kun into the room by his ankles. Haruno Sakura took after her mother quite well…from her distinctive pink hair, to the horrid screech she made when she was angry, and maybe the competent singing skills she had. The girl didn't meet Naruto-kun until she was well into the academy; before, she was just a fangirl looking to get into Tsukihime's ice queen pants. Now, after almost getting shot by a startled Naruto as he was practicing his archery, and having an enjoyable argument with him afterwards, she was torn between asking Tsukihime out for a date, and taking Naruto to some dark corner to do whatever she wanted with him.

When she was about to ask why she and her team had come to her, scragglier than before, Kasumi raised her hand as Sakura sat him down on a seat. "Don't ask. I'm pretty sure Naruto-kun will tell you everything." She then turned to face Naruto with an almost flirtatious look in her eyes. "And you…don't hesitate to visit me and Gal-chan whenever you like."

As soon as Team Seven got their pay from Iruka-chan, Naruto soon realized that he was alone with his grandmother figure. "I'm pretty sure you realize how overkill it was of you to get all the genin teams to capture me. I mean, come on!"

"Well what do you expect? You've been getting better at evading a lot of our kunoichi teams since you started pranking a lot of the vendors."

A contrite look on his face was all it took for Naruto to put Hiromi in a better mood. "Point taken."

"So, you mind telling me how you got here?"

…

[Somewhere else in Konohagakure no Sato…]

Word had reached her, and Sango didn't know what to think. Of course she was happy! She wanted to run up and see the child again…even if it was from a distance. But then again, she knew that it would tip her hand…and the knowledge of what she'd done would only cause Hiromi-chan to look down on her even worse than she did now. Then also came the problem of what would probably happen if she up and showed up so suddenly in the child's life.

After that face-to-face encounter long ago, Sango knew that she needed to take this slowly with the grandchild, otherwise, it'd be a repeat-performance of that fateful night…

…

[A park in Konohagakure—years ago…]

This was a fine night for Sango to take a walk. She needed to clear her head for the task to come tomorrow. Finding the bench she normally stopped at, she soon sat down to take in the view; there was a large pond where koi would gather, waiting to be fed. Different sizes and colors would come on out, and the beauty of what she was seeing under the water was more than enough to make the day even better. In fact, it put a rare smile on her face as she enjoyed the view she was seeing.

Before long, someone had landed right in front of her. The figure then quickly stood to her feet, and revealed her face…and it was one she knew very well. , walking towards Sango with a furious look on her features. With every step she took, one ROOT operative was knocked out, until the woman stopped right in front of her. Even though Sango only had the use of one eye, she could see clearly who this person was. Blonde hair, clear blue eyes, and very soft features that reminded her of only one other person. "We need to talk," she said, coming to a stop right in front of her. "_**NOW**_."

"What is there to talk about, Mina?" asked Sango. She'd come up with a variety of situations

"I know the truth, Sango." said Mina, the hatred clear in her tone. For their simplicity, her words had shot an arrow into her heart.

If she were visibly shaken by her claim, Sango did not show it. But still, it begged the question. "How did you know?"

At this point, Mina's cold rage had continued to boil. "You didn't think I noticed you watching me from time to time since our first encounter did you? Or how about the fact that the ROOT agents you had shadowing me are far more incompetent than you think? And what about the fact that the seals you put on those poor girls were dispelled by me before I questioned them? I want answers, Sango! I want you to tell me, why now…you never paid any attention to me while growing up, so what changed? What makes you think you have the right to walk into my life, when you made it clear that you never wanted me from the very beginning? What makes you think you can be a father to me now?!"

Sango seemed to have been broken by what she was hearing. This was exactly what she feared would happen…but she supposed that Mina deserved the truth, and she was not going down without a fight. "Do you think I wanted it to be this way? To have you walking up like this and talking down to me? If anything, I actually wanted to kill you at first…I blamed you for the death of your mother in my own grief the day you were born! What stopped me from killing you was the fact that I saw so much of her in you, that I couldn't bring myself to do so. It wasn't until that day I saw you and Kushina when we were all locked up together that I realized I'd made a mistake…and that I was too late to correct it!"

Mina remained silent, but her silence was telling, but Sango's anger had gone down when she looked back up into her daughter's eyes. "I know I'll never be able to fix what I've done; believe what you will, but everything I've done from that day on has been for you…I've just never had the guts to tell you the truth because of what's happening now. As a matter of fact, I was perfectly content with watching you from afar, and secretly feeling proud that you'd gotten to where you are."

Letting out a disappointed sigh, Mina turned away from Sango. "I have no father…she died the day she chose to leave me behind in an orphanage. You're just a ghost of what was could've been."

With that said, Mina had shunshined away, leaving Sango behind in tears…

…

[Present day…]

It just so happened that the month after that confrontation, Hiromi had chosen to pass the hat on down. Sango had always wanted to take up the Hokage hat, but she was overlooked for two people…that fascist Otohime, and her own daughter Mina. On the one hand, she was disappointed that she was not going to be Hokage, but Sango was glad that Mina-chan had the opportunity to do the very thing she'd wanted to do. Come to think of it, she supposed that Mina's reason for being Hokage was like her original reason; before she was overtaken by the darkness in her heart.

She convinced Koharu and Homura to vote for Mina…contrary to what most people would believe if it were ever found out, Sango didn't convince them to vote for Mina was not because she was her daughter. While seeing Mina more regularly was a bonus that she definitely wanted, her true reasons for getting Mina into power were twofold: firstly, to make sure the Fascist never made it office and perform those damnable experiments ever again; and secondly, because Mina was actually leader-material.

At first, their relations were cold, and arguments on the right decision were commonplace. However, as the years went by, Sango and Mina started to warm up to each other ever-so-slightly…the arguments were still commonplace, but Sango felt that someone had to play the devil's advocate on Mina's decisions; both to keep her on her toes, and to have something to talk about.

Eventually, they became a real family…even though Mina refused to admit it. When young Naruto was born, Sango was overjoyed (she didn't look it, because she was around Hiromi after all). However, her condition for truly accepting Sango into the family (even privately) was simple: she had to be there for Naruto as his grandmother.

As she thought on it, perhaps Mina was rolling in her grave at this very moment…and was likely to walk out of the grave in an alliance with Sango's own father to punish her for making their eternal slumber uncomfortable.

Still, it wasn't as though she didn't try to keep her promise; after all, Naruto-kun needed someone to watch over him from the shadows whenever that hussy of a godmother Jinya was out in the Kunoichi nations managing her spy network, and writing her stupid, juvenile porn novels. As a matter of fact, loath as she was to admit it, Sango was a closet porn enthusiast; and in all honesty, she'd read much better smut than that amateur could ever manage in her lifetime!

In any case, she watched Naruto grow up to be such a fine man…and ripe for marriage. Perhaps she could… '_Calm down, Sango!'_ she thought to herself, '_Now is not the time for planning an arranged marriage…that comes later.'_

…

_**A/N: For some reason I'm feeling particularly **__**villainous**_ _**for this update…hopefully it's good enough for those of you that like my stories. As a reminder to everyone reading while I attempt to unthaw "Naruto: The Dark Knight REMIXED" I have a poll as to which class of Slayer Naruto should start off as. You only have until this chapter is done until I confirm which class Naruto will be, so do vote now, would you kindly?**_

…

_**Translations for breast size (this is to give a general idea of what I mean)**_

_**Flat=A-cup and under**_

_**Modest=B-cup to D-cup**_

_**Generous=E-cup and up**_

…

_**Pairings so far (not in the harem):**_

_**Confirmed:**_

_**Sarutobi Asami (fem Asuma) x Yūhi Kurenai—this will remain canon**_

_**Hatake Kasumi (fem Kakashi) x Maito Gal (fem Gai)—at least here, the former getting a piggy-back ride from the latter will be more tolerable than canon**_

_**Hagane Kōtetsu (gender-bent, but kept her name) x Kamizuki Izuna (fem Izumo…duh)**_

_**Gekko Hayami (fem Hayate) x Uzuki Yūgao—this will still be canon**_

_**Considering (may add more):**_

_**Moegi x Uki (fem Udon)**_

_**Momochi Ayaka (fem Zabuza) x Terumi Mei**_

_**Akimichi Choko (fem Choji) x Yamanaka Ino**_

_**Senju Tsunade x Shizune**_

_**Senju Tsunade x Jinya (fem Jiraya)**_

_**Rio (fem Roshi) x Han**_

_**Uchiha Itachi x Hoshigaki Chizuru (fem Kisame)**_

_**Sarutobi Konami (fem Konohamaru) x Hyūga Hanabi**_

…

_**Harem Girls:**_

_**Confirmed:**_

_**Hyūga Hinata—she's one of my core harem choices**_

_**Tenten—another of my core harem choices**_

_**Mitarashi Anko—one of my core harem choices**_

_**Uchiha Tsukihime (fem Sasuke)—too many Satsuki's, why not name her Setsuka, or Setsuna for that matter?**_

_**Kurama—I wonder what will break first, her spirit or her body?**_

_**Rock Lin—she's one of the orphans Naruto grew up with, no way she's not going to be in there…and by the way, to those of you who think that 'Lei' is a perfect name for a female Rock Lee, I will remind you that it's just the Cantonese way of saying 'Lee' (for those of you who don't speak Cantonese)**_

_**Haku—she could be smitten on first sight**_

_**Fū—a sound one**_

_**Considering (may add more):**_

_**Sabaku no Gaia (fem Gaara)**_

_**Kaze no Temari**_

_**Shizuka**_

_**Akimichi Choko**_

_**Yamanaka Ino**_

_**Senju Tsunade**_

_**Shizune**_

_**Hyūga Nami (fem Neji)**_

_**Hyūga Hanabi**_

_**Kazahana Koyuki**_

_**Inuzuka Kiba**_

_**Inuzuka Hana**_

_**Inuzuka Tsume**_

_**Sai**_

_**Killer B**_

_**Samui**_

_**Tayuya**_

_**Kugutsu no Kanayo (fem Kankuro)**_

_**Kurotsuchi**_

_**Akatsuchi**_

_**Nī Yugito**_

_**Yakushi Kaede (fem Kabuto)**_

_**Uchiha Itachi**_

_**Jinya**_

_**Sarutobi Konami (fem Konohamaru); and yes, Konami is an actual name**_

…

_**Vocabulary/Culture Notes**_

_**Mitarashi—it is a sweet syrup made from soy sauce that is typically used for dango…it is also Anko's surname.**_

_**Slash novel—pretty much a yaoi novel**_

_**Marriage age—I'm going by the fact that Naruto is pretty much based on Feudal Japan; in those days, it was not uncommon for children to be married by age 13…Minato and Kushina may be a little more modernized if they married later**_


End file.
